Category: Dating and Relationships
Just wondering if anyone else here may feel the same way I do about close friendships or dates? It has happened to me on a couple of occasions that I have heard some remarks being made as jokes and not sure if at least some of it was true or not. I usually know when joke is a joke, but have had some few bad encounters and at times fear that some things from the past may repeat themselves again. Just wondering how you deal with such things.
Hmmm. Without being specific, its hard to say. I guess what I'm thinking is that any time we try and establish a close relationship whether friendship or dating, there's a certain amount of risk or trust involved. We have to decide if based on what we know about the individual involved makes taking that risk worthwhile.
Hope this helps,
Lou
Yes, I understand what you mean. I wasn't now thinking about just factual things you can find out for sure, but more about things related to their general and psychological health.
A lot of the way you can tell if someone is joking or not is by their
vocal tone. Often times you can hear in someone's voice whether they are smiling or not, unless theyy're completey deadpan about it, and then it gets difficult. Then I've just had to judge on the context of the conversation, and what I know about that person thus far. And sometimes, I've actually had to ask, "Are you joking or serious?" But that's rare. If you're talking to someone online and don't have the advantage of hearing their voice, it can also be hard. Screen readers don't carry that type of thing very well. But usually then, if someone is joking about something, they're liable to put the words grin, or smile, or things like, JK, LOL, that kind of stuff after whatever they say. If they don't, and you're not sure if they're joking orserious about whatever comment they've made, then again, I think the best course of action is to ask. Like Lou, since we don't have specifics, it's hard to answer your question, and know if we're really giving you the answers you're looking for.
I agree with all that. Thanks,
H'mmm, interesting one, this. I usually find, not so much by judging people on a once-off basis, but that track records are good things to by, if you follow my drift.
If you know a person well enough over a period of time, whether in the real or virtual world, you can fairly predict how they will react in certain situations. I suppose what I'm saying is that it is universally believed that our past actions will predict our future behaviour, and whether we like it or not, others sometimes know us better than we think they do, in terms of flashpoints and shortcomings.
Perhaps these factors can help you determine if whoever said waht is either joking or serious.
Indeed, but sometimes it is not so, even if you had known someone for years!